ive broken up a girl's heart and i know it's hard for her to let it be mended. im such a jerk to have her believe my words. im such a letdown when it comes to relationships. yes, i know i am. but i want her to know that when my words were said, i meant it deep and it was purely genuine. we had great moments together and yes, i felt that feelin. it has never been a lie nor it was even bullshit. in that very moment, the words that bein whispered to her ear, i could feel somehow that i could go on the life im havin with her as far as we both could see. i couldnt believe myself that my feelings towards her were fadin. i asked myself just why but the anwers just couldnt be found. i wanted the best for us and even to have more great moments. naturally, i dont feel a thing anymore. tell me, how the hell am i supposed to carry on? i feel utterly bad for making her having hopes for me. for us. and it does applies a very heavy heart for me to say it out the truth. i know i should gave her a chance. but, i just couldnt. and truth is, it has never been a lie. i did feel it deep when i said those words to her. i may not be the man of my words of one or two but think back about the others.i let her down, yes. and im truly sorry bout it. even how sorry i feel, i know it wont change a thing. my intentions were all good and i wanted for a break up coz it would be unfair for her to lead us on when im not myself. i will never forgive myself for this. and all im seekin for now is her forgiveness. im just sorry that it'd turned out this way. i never plan to hurt her. im just doin the right thing. hurtin her aint the right thing, yes. neither is bein one-sided love and let her keep the relationship strong. im sorry to have her hurt so badly. if she herself feels that all the things ive done were all bullshit, think again. i wouldnt be doin it if it wasnt true. if you were to realise that there's no chemistry anymore and you've tried so hard to gain back and have tried to work it out but you still cant help to feel the same, would you carry on or would you break the ties? you tell me.




im not havin second thoughts,
im not trynna give hopes.
somehow i felt the need to say it out.
i hope it triggers to anyone who cares.
love.

3:59 PM
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