screwed up. i was stumblin all the time. fucks. i cudnt help maself but to juz keep on stumblin. wats wrong with me? i blew it off. its like, i dun even undastan words dat ma mouth speaks to them. i was crappin all along. from their expression, i cud tell dat they were bored. fucksfucksfucks. im dead. for dat moment, i wanted to kill them. as well as stabbin ma own heart too. im done for. maybe bcoz i dun get enuff luck from evryone. or was it i was too nervous till i cud feel dat ma heart is at ma throat? fucks. i need a time machine. really. i wanna start all over again. haiz. maybe, if i cud find the greatest scientist ever to turn back the time, dis can be done but still, for the record, i gona fail ma malay oral exam for sho' sia.....

-------------

so after dat, went to workshop for dnt. im quite done. all i need to do is to juz laquer ma artefact. den im totali done. weee! doin it tmw. yeayea. had fun in the workshop juz now. illah keeps on promptin me for help seh which is so annoyin! hahah. she keeps on like 'flirtaciously', askin me for help, which, disgust me totally! haha. and, we keep on disturbin each other like crazy. she juz cant stop pinchin me. damn it. hahha. all bcoz i didnt help her. nwy, i didnt help coz i was too damn tired sia. later den, had a short nap with fadzley on a couch in dis room next to the workshop. whoa. so comfortable sia. when i woke up, it came to ma mind dat im home. only to be shocked later dat i was actuali in sch. haha. stupid. den, packed things up and went home straight. wanted to take a nap again b4 it'll be maghrib, but mom told me to mit bro @ compass point to buy for the both of us of the bus concession. hah. mom was like panickin seh when she knew dat the due date is actuali ystdy. roite. duno why but she reprimanded us like as if we've done so wrong. haha. rite. . .

--------------

nwy, ppl, tmw i aint cumin to sch. got a check up again. rite. like, sial ah, sampai bile sak. like, when will the real results be out??? haiya. and do i really need to take that operation the doc once said? haiyo. nobody is fillin me in seh. and like also, tmw's appointment was like suddenly i was told. rite. is somebody trynna keep smtg from me??? wat sickness do i really have here? its like as if im havin SARS, with HIV and Aids and cancer plus bird flu carryin in me. haha. k. ive gone too far. maybe there's even like aint anything actuali i shud be worryin bout. guess this is all juz wild thoughts. haha. mepek! anw, gona miz ma homies in sch for sho. will they miz me too?haha. as if. so anw, now i know why suddenly hernie's not in sch ystdy. haha. she is juz

's i c k'. ok. and it'll take two weeks sia.....! haiyo. . . . .

nwy, to fafa, c'mon, dun get so uptight. im sorry i said those things. and also, you told me we're not thinkin the same way as you do. i admit, i dun. but seriously sometimes i do. maybe you dun realise it but ive tried to be dere for you in every way i cud. its not like i mean anything. its friendship-wise. so dun get the wrong idea. you know, i do concerned bout you sometimes bein too quiet or seems troubled. even how you've tried not to show it, i cud see. and, to tell you, you bein hot-tempered cud be resulted in the other way round. try to juz get hold onto urself and be cool. juz chill girl. . .

hope you be aite. . .

~i miz arfah tremendously...

.:Fadhli<32>Arfah:.