hey...

first and foremost, to Chermain, Happy 17th Birthday! i have missed her alot. met her ystdy. went to Hard Rock Cafe, celebratin her b'day dere wif old frens and new frens of her's. came down together wif farhan. i miz him sia. he's ma bro since we're in fourth grade. Ya Ting, Joanne, Sheng Ping, Ah Xiang and Louis was dere too. Louis is ma closest fren ever sia way back in pri sch. and im juz so happy i got to mit all of them. its been long. ok. gave the birthday girl a flower that i made out maself for her present coz i duno wat else to give her. she was so beautiful sia. sheng ping told me she actuali still like me. hmmm. rite. too bad i got maself a girl oredi. and she knows that.

she had a good surprise ystdy. she was away to the toilet when suddenly she's out, the performers called out her name and told everybody it was her b'day. haha. so everybody in that cafe sang the birthday song to her. wif the clappin and all. haha. she was so the damn paisey sia. blah3, so i helped out cuttin the cake and Chermain den passed it to her frens. she was sayin she's paisey everytime i gave her the plates wif the slices of the cake. hahahaha. she's cute sia.

blah3, we all den went to play pool nearby. blah3, i had to go. i wished her happy birthday again and walked off. farhan and some stayed to play until 3am. crazy. had fun and all celebratin her bday. and its every year we always celebrate our birthday together. mine was on the 20th and her's 24th and Ya Ting 25th. we three always celebrate on Chermain's bday. i remembered last year one was at Pasir Ris chalet. dis year at Hard Rock sia. kaye sak ni anak. haha.

so, today is Ya Ting's day. the day she came out from the mother. hehe. to Ya Ting, Happy 17th Birthday!!! i wanna slap her face! she pinched and punched me ystdy, sayin it was her present for me. and i cant have ma revenge coz she said her bday havent come. ishhh. i also duno when our next mitin. seems like we onli see each other once a year. hah.

anw, im sorry i didnt update for quite some time. ive been sick. and i mean, real sick. started to be sick since on the 18th. i got better on the 23rd. heh. had high fever for the first time for three days straight. ma cough haven got any better tho. sialan. i hate cough sia.

guess im out. gonna go have a short nap. got sch sia later. fucks.
so far, sch fun. im enjoyin ite. wahahahah. azni's words startin to be true. so yea, you were right...

outty.

11:38 PM
0 heroic comments

hey...

so guess what. today is ma first day in ITE. posted to ITE College Central MacPherson Campus. the day was pretty borin and durin the openin speech and all, i sleep sia! wahahaha. rite. it was like so the slpy sia. the speaker dun really know how to like make it sound interestin. wah lao. sian sia. many people were present there. duh~! first day what. ok. lame.

going to school wif the one and only, Sopo! haha. dats what ive been callin him now. he's name is sopfian actually. mit up at 8 plus at sengkang bus interchange. there have a straight bus to the school but! the journey took bout an hour sia. dammit seh. i almost vomit in the bus. sop was shriekin everytime i acted as if im about to vomit. wahaha. dats funny. he's a total belo. pak belo. haha. ok. i cannot really have a long bus ride you see. im bus-sick. the long the journey is, the more headaches will i get.

reached sch ard 9.10am. tot we were late and only to find out they're about to set off to respective classroom when we arrived at the foyer. we're at the nick of time. blah3, went up to the classroom and settle down. made a fren named nash. he's from yishun sec. he came to me and we shook hands. sat beside him den. blah3, our form teacher, Mr Wong Siew Kin, wanted us to intro ourself. i was like 'oh damn'. i felt like its kindergarten again. and so we all did. blah3, it was tea break. so we all set off to the canteen and chill...

while enterin the canteen, many of the seniors were already there, were all lookin at us. all the mat rips and wateva start callin out names and stuff. it was so the kecoh. blah3, met sop again. he's in mechatronics anw. den, me, nash and sopo chill while havin our drinks. blah3, it was time to be up again. assembled at the foyer and off we went to the auditorium. that's when i slept. spent almost an hour and a half there. talks and craps were said. disciplinary and shits. blah3, tour ard the campus...

that's when i made more new frens. there came hayat, bob, saed, kelvin, mashita, nadira, remy, azlan, kok siew, and duno who. forgot. blah3, it was lunch time. we all went down to the canteen and mkn. well, me and nash didnt. the rest did. we all sat together at this one big table and talk amongst ourselves. we chilled2 and suddenly, there this one girl, a senior, walkin right thru me. came up to me and suddenly opened up a convo by askin me, 'so you're the new batch in this jan intake?'. we chat for a while and i stumbled alot. i dun practically say antg. den, she asked for ma number. rite. didnt gave it to her tho. juz told her that we cud juz talk in sch. her name is hayati anw...

so, arfah's curse was right. indeed there's someone wanna get to know me. rite. but like, wah lao.... first day sia..... mepek sak. k, back to the story. den blah3, went up to the auditorium again. got talks and shits. blah3, it was time to go home, which supposingly ends at 5 that we ended early at 3. ok...

hmm. in ma class, hayat giler. after the lunch time, he cabut skola and went to mit his gf at paya lebar mrt. rite. bob cabut jgk. giler. they asked we all along but we didnt go. we stay. a potential of a gd ite student huh? hahaha! rite. k. pape. nadirah and this girl i duno her name is the prettiest in ma class. haha. rite. this nad keep lookin at me and i duno why. one point of time, we both were like in front of each other, she suddenly smiled. i turned away. hah! ok. wtf. this mashita, she likes to laugh. and her laugh always makin us wanna laugh. hah. she's cute. she's 19 and from ite clementi. duno why she suddenly in macp. she's plump and chubby! wahaha. hayat suke kacau dier. padahal baru kenal... rite.

all the names that i mentioned above, surprisinly, when we all were talkin, its like as if we know each other since childhood. haha. it was great knowin them and all. that kelvin is a veteran of an ah beng. he's 18. and like, he stop gangsterism for the better. cool huh. mat rips nowadays know whats right and wrong oredi. hah! tmw i'll be mitin him and we go school together. haha. rite.

so far, sch was aite. kinda fun la. the seniors that act as a motivator of our class are all cool. one very the becok. wahaha. lookin forward to see hayat gettin beef wif our form teacher. haha. cabut skola lagi...

hmm. anw, there's another thing i wanna tok about. its bout Elizabeth. Elizabeth Hopes Grave. she's one of ma old fren in primary sch. well, we were close last time until secondary school time got us apart. its been real long since we last met. there this one day, we met at wlds interchange coincidencely. she saw me and was like, 'NIZAM!!!'. i was paisey sia. she shouted ma name like nobody's business. and she suddenly hugged me. we chat for some time when suddenly, i was told by her that she's leavin dis country and will never come back. she's migratin. at china. she's eurasion anw. her dad got a business there. they're filthy rich sia. anw, i was shocked bout the news and i was speechless then.

blah3, days passed and the day she'll b leavin has come. it was yesterday. i came down to the airport to see her off. it was so an emotional day for me. and to everyone else there too. Elizabeth cried so many times. she juz cant expect that she's actually leavin and not returnin. den like, one time, all of her frens give her a big hug together. me and sopo joined. some cried and some juz really cryin. nathan, her bro, cried real bad too. his frens were present too. he's from admiralty sec. seen some familiar faces there. blah3, it was time for her to leave. we all juz tried to juz gave some smile to her. we waved at her till she's out of sight. i was cryin too sia somehow. haiz. were gettin emo and stuff. haiz...

i juz cant take the blow. it was like so long we didnt meet up and when we do, she had to leave! we didnt even have the time to catch things up. haiz. but, in a way or another, we promised to keep in touch thru email. hmm. will be missin her alot. will never forget her for sho.....

anw, talkin bout migratin... maybe... MAYBE... in two years time or so, i'll be migratin too. well, ma adek sdare will be migratin to austrailia and studyin there. her mom, which is ma mum's sis, will send her there after she finish her PSLE. and ma another adek sdare, 15 dis year, after her o's, her mom will send her there too. soon, the whole fam will den move to austrailia. at the same time, i was asked to further ma studies there too. migratin as well. but i haven gave ma makcik the answer yet. she expect me to go anw. rite. but to me, i duno. im still considerin. well i got two years to think bout it...

hmm... wat do you all think? shud i juz go and spent the rest of ma life there or stay and bein wif you guys? as for me, i wanna study there but at the same time, beloved frens of mine is all here in SG. arfah and everybody are here. damn. but im juz afraid if things got me left no choice that i still have to go. haiz. let's see the verdict when the time comes...

i think dats all for the day to say about. thx for readin ma entry...

and to apen, im all a go-go. first price PSP? no sweat bro. the game is on...
and fyi, this is not the longest yet...

tc ppl...

3:57 PM
0 heroic comments

hey...

there's a lot of things to say and im sooo gona write a long entry.
so be prepare...
you can leave if you're lazy to read on...

ok. well, i had a long day yesterday. its Hari Raya Aidil'ladha. the day of the sacrificial lambs. alotta things i did and alotta things happened. but where do i start? ok. well, began the day by wakin up soo early in the morn. get ready the baju kurung and stuff. blah3, time for sembayang subuh. blah3 and time passed and its about time for sembayang raye. so den, dad and me was out. bro din tag along coz he's sick. rite. so fake. obvious sia he's puttin an act. mls ckp mls ar.

hmm. ok. den, guess wat? while we were on our way ma father told me the prayers will be held under the block where terawih is there across the street, we see no one wearin baju kurung too walkin ard there nor even see anybody ard. seems quite deserted. so den ma instinct tells me that there wun be any prayers held there at the MPH. ma dad still wans to check it out. but it was so obvious sia. it was rainin cats and dogs some more. and the umbrella that sheltered us cudnt fit the two of us in. so i was sort of wet. dad was aite. haiz. and he still wana go there. so when we reached there, indeed i was rite. not even a single soul to be seen. rite.

so den, we discussed whether to pray at the masjid an'nur or masjid al-istiqamah. we went to al-istiqamah. prayed there, blah3, den went home. got home, den siap2 again den went out again. to masjid wak tanjong. go retrieve the kambing there. haha. well, ma dad's adek bradek order two kambings. its for ma late granddad and i duno whose. maybe both is for him. arrived at ard 12pm. and was like there for three hours sia.

hmm, sembayang zuhur there. and guess wat? while all the islam there were prayin, kambing terlepas!!! serious sia. the goat entered inside the plc we all ngah pray sia. wah lao. the goat bumped hard to the ppl ard and some ppl actuali went to stop that goat. that goat was like beside me sia before it was caught and when i was ru'kú. haiz. crazy.

blah3, it was three plusplus, den went to kubur, jln bahar. visit ma granddad. and ma cousin's granddad. by that time the rain has stopped. and guess wat? there's like quick sand everywhere. everytime i tend to step onto the mud and all, i feel like im bein sucked down. rite. all the guys went to the kubur, barefoot. we all have too. it was yucky alright. but kinda feels good. haha. bro, cousins, uncles and me all felt like we are all budak2 kampong sia. haha.

the cemetry land was said itz good to be like use it to wash anything. tanah liat pe. spent quite a few hours there. met azli, an old fren. as mat rip as ever. he'll never change. but he's got heart ar. ni baik nye mat rip. hahaha. rite. ok. y'all know wat.. there got sell ice-cream. really. haha. so singlish. everytime we went there, we buy ice-cream from this mini van. haha. after bace2, doa2 and all, we all chilled for a mmt and set off to hougang, visit ma auntie.

blah3, reached to the plc, everybody lepak sia. all were kepenatan. rite. so, eat2 there and watched hot chick. haha. everybody was like so concentratin when the show starts. so there's like silence. haha. like funny you know. and when the part is funny, everyone laugh real loud. haha. cool ar. blah3, it was time to go home. i got duit raye! hehe. but as for ma fam, we proceed to ma mum's side plak. we went to visit granny! i miz her.

chilled there. and when i was watchin tv, granddad suddenly sat beside me with two ribbons in each of his hands. and so, he suddenly said to me he wants to teach me how to make a ketupat! i was like, ok. so i learn how make one. it was confusin and difficult sia. but, after bout ten minutes, i got it! haha. i know apen wud get sarcastic sometimes and go so wats the big fuck. but apen, if u're readin this, itz ketupat beb. bukan senang. haha.

so i know how to make a ketupat oredi. how wonderful. all thanks to ma granddad! haha. cool shit. okok, anw, i was out juz now to ite macpherson. got briefin and stuff for the first day. rite. wateva. so i guess, welcome to the ite world huh. haiz. long journey sia to go to that macpantat. sort of mls. haiz. okok.

anw, arfah made a new fren. and ma negative tots have got all conquered me. it got me all negative. hah. rite. well, he's name is hidzir. and from commonwealth sec. jealous i m, but i think i m overreactin. i know like there's ntg actuali shud i be worryin but it juz got me wonderin at times. i know she loves me but shits happen. you can never know. i juz hope she wun betray me, again. i guess its juz ma biggest fear that i might lose her. i duno wat wud i do really if we're apart. i know i cant see maself as wat i used to be. hmm. to arfah, im sorry if im bein unreasonable. im tryin to bear in mind dats there's ntg to worry and im still tryin. im not blamin you for makin new frens. its not wrong so dun feel bad bout it if you do. its juz me. im quite a negative thinker. so dats why you're in ma life. to get me positive. hah. rite. i love you sweetheart... i'll try not to be such a pain in the ass...

guess im out now. tc ppl...
-apen, entry mo lawan?
haha....



~yay! i know how to make ketupat!!!

3:42 PM
0 heroic comments

hey...

well, its been a long day for me. im kinda beat now actuali. and like, im quite half asleep while writin dis entry. rite. somehow im real tired la. well, its becoz ystdy, i slept onli like abt one and a half hour. d early morn i go lepak wif bran and sis dwnstairs. more of a sneak out. i nvr slp. like sumhow cant slp sia. after lepak-ing, it was about 4.50am. got home den went to ma room. i lied down on ma sofabed and next thing i knew, i was aslp. rite.

i was so deep into ma dreams wen suddenly i felt some tappin that really irritates me on ma body. well, it was ma sis who tryin to wake me up coz i nd to go to sch. i was still in daze till i check out the time, i was damn wide awake. it was 6.13am. im late coz im supposed to be dere by 6.30am. rite. i have a real quick bath and get change. i was like so damn in a hurry. runnin here and there in the crib like i was sort of playin a game that i need to win. rite.

i was out 6.50am. blah3, reached sch 7.30am, and onli to find out everyone haven fall-in and ma frens are hvg their breakfast at the nearby S11. i was relieved then. im not late somehow. so, after i got change to a proper attire, i went and help out to brush up the steps and alignment of ma PDS team. took few rehearsals and den it was showtime! damn.

i was the one who got real nervous. ma hands got all cold. really. blah3, the PDS item is up next. we did a last minute thing bout commandin to march in the squad. and it turn out great! no cock ups. so, the music starts and the PDS show their steps. i was like hvg millions of butterflies in ma stomach sia. haha! blah3, it turned out AWESOME!!!!! although there's a lil cock up, BUT! overall, lawa sak!!! dey did really well!!!! ... if i cud have ten thumbs, it's really a nine thumbs up sia....! hahah! get it? rite. they all then gave a big hug to me sia. everyone sia. i was bein squeezed. crazy cadets.

den, some teachers, ma COs and almost everybody gave credits to me. rite. but the diligent work and all wasnt really all by maself. shud as well goes to Syazwan, Audi, Sairi and Azreil too! we all did a great job. haiz. it really was a mezmerisin moment. n i got it on video! wee! can watch it everyday. cool shit. they put it off real well sia. blah3, the sec one oreintation was great sia. had real F-U-N. do some craps and stuff. haiz. giler la...

and the story goes on...

blah3, got home nearly 3pm and blah3, went out again ard 6.30pm. go to the arts hse. got dis platform 6 special. lazy wanna elabo. had fun chillin wif some of the other crews. made new frens again and blah3. anw, Dual Flavaz put off a gd performance sia. the beats was like the-damn-freakin-the-mother-shitto nice sia. its outta dis world!! nice giler bab sia. some crews were as dope too. got dis one crew, namely 'house of phoenomenous, 'mepek sak. salah bawak seh. so like a thug ass wannabe. go home la watch porno for kids better. haha. rite. they're like rappin and like the chorus part, sooooo gore and metal!! like, wat the heck? they shout like a one ramli sarip sia. mepekmepek.

blah3, after that gig, go Lau Pa Sat and wat else... makan la! ate satay, nasi pataya and ... dats all la. haha. and coca cola for the throat. chillin-chillo for some time den off to home. and now here i m, home sweet home...

and ive juz realised i've made a long entry. rite. thank you for readin along....
rite. ok. i had fun. have you?
wah lau weh. tired sia.

5:33 PM
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hey...

im like sooo borin rite now. bro not home. sis not home. dad gettin ready for work. mum at aunt's crib nearby. haiz...

when i got home frm sch, dad was snorin away on the bed. and found no one's home when i searched the hse. bro got campfire at his school for the sec one thingy. sis still haven back frm sch. haiz. there's no one to entertain me.........

anw, go lepak wif riffy, wan, khai and faz today, hah. miz them. then, went for NCC trainin today. it was fun. i was asked to help out for the Precision Drill Squad(PDS). actuali, there's CLT Kay Kiat to help them out. but then, i duno why that one day, dat Yap called me and asked me to come down. he said the boys juz wan me to train them. i was like, '???'. den i agreed to help out. i missed ma section squad anw. haha! so i train and train and train. taught the moves, the drills and stuff. choreograph here and there. and i put it off well! really...! and when its time to show the COs, got many credits from all of them. Mr yap gave a wide smile sia. that's like a miracle coz its like hard to c him smilin away in NCC. haha. well, shudnt really go out to me but to wan, audi, azreil and sairi too. even though sairi juz helped out to play the track, he still help anw. haha! without them, it wun be as perfect as it seems anw...

so the big day is tmw. and i have to be down. again. and everyone has to be dere like 6.30 in the morn. rite. despite the exception Yap gave me to come down at seven coz im stayin at sengkang, i still wanna come down wif the rest. yea. i dun mind anw. and i dont think i gonna slp. even if i do, i wake up late. rite. Brandon(ma neighbour) and me planned to go lepak ard 1am at duckie. haha. at least i got smtg to do in the early mornin...

so ma day today was practically fine, although i felt empty. well, its becoz, i nvr get to c arfah! haiz. its not like last year anymore. the days dat i cud c her almost everyday cudnt be the same to this year. coz im not schlin and i cant go out much. rite. dis is sucks. wateva...

so ok la. i think ma entry sucks anw..... haha. dont you think so?

out.

2:03 PM
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hey...

so my night wudnt be the same anymore. there wont be late night calls with arfah anymore. well, school startin and she gotta get some early sleep. and, i have to get used to this. hmm. met her today. sent her back home. so like at last we see each other...

anw, i woke up this mornin and found myself at the wrong side of the bed. and when i went out of ma room, found out no one's home. i was alone. then, memories all came strike back at me. i start to have flashbacks of those times that i had to be awake early and must take the 6.30am bus 161 to wlds. hah. rite. and like, everyday i was in a hurry. and when ive reached wlds, coincidencely like almost everyday i'll see yazid in the same bus as me. and we go to school together. hmm.

its hard to face it but i have to anw. life goes on and moves on. so shud i. muneera told me that school really wasnt the same as before. and she said, we as a group used to be even. but now we're odd. coz its lack of one. 10 becomes 9. damn. i feel bad when i heard that. sometimes, questions ran through ma mind like askin myself of wat is so special that i have in me till everybody seems to be in despair. well, i cudnt get any better either. leavin them and such. im such a dumbass...

well, dats them and me.
i'll be damn. like why do i have to leave? all make it but not me? wth. haiz. wat a luck. i'll be missin them very much. and, most importantly, i'll never forget y'all! dont worry. i'll keep ma words...

.:fad->arf:.

6:12 PM
0 heroic comments

hey...

its the new year! haha. i know im like a lil bit too late to say this. but wth la. haha. so, 2005 has been an eventful year for me. it has left me beautiful memories and experiences. and one thing for sure, i will never forget the day that i saw that shootin star at potong pasir. hmm. anw, so its 2006 now. i hope it'll be more of an eventful year too...

anw, today is Impian Muliawani's 17th birthday! damn, she's 17 already. mine will be sooner. hehe. went to her party at her crib. well, despite the word 'fun' i shud describe ma day was, the gatherin we had was rather an emotional day for me. the usual suspects was there. -me, wan, yzd, faz, khai, fafa, illah and moon. the rest cudnt make it. mimi was there too. its been long since we've met. the part that kinda torn ma heart is when we had to say each other goodbye. took some photo b4 we all go. the boys stayed, includin me, but lepak at the nearby RC instead. we played poker cards and stuff till it was about maghrib. we took some photos again and shook each other goodbye. i hate to see them leave. haiz. so then, it was juz me and yzd. told him i wanna go to 'yuppo' and so he followed me along. we chilled and chilled. anw, when we reached to the plc, hernie suddenly came into mind. and so i tot of tellin her im there and wanted to wave at her. and so i did. cudnt see her face tho. hah. i miz her. i was kinda belo sia. and, somehow, i feel that im juz too lame. whahaha...

anw, well, im kinda not used to it dat 3rd jan i actuali aint schoolin. tmw sch is re-openin and its not for me. damn. sooo not used to this. im suck. totally suck. to the max. why i have to leave them? i know i'll miz them. and so are they. yzd kept tellin me like, 'kan zam! sape lagi aku bleh gi skola same2?! sape lagi yg akan kacau aku?!' and so on. damn. tmw they're schoolin and im not. haiz. i'll miz those fun/crap/sad/happy/irritatin/angry/lame moments we've had together. now, i had no illah to kacau sayin, 'funny ar!'. i had no wan to say, 'jgn gay ngan aku ar!'. i had no fafa to say, 'i'll beat you in maths!'. i had no khai to say, 'we're the banglah brothers!'. i had no yzd to say, 'oh burung..'. i had no moon to say, 'kau jgn nak step adek Siti Nurhalizah ar!'. i had no impy to say, 'hi kakak! muli ade?'. and so on. haiz. i sounded as if im dyin. bleargh~. its not as if like i wun be seein them. hah. i will. and that's wat they promise too. haiz...

i wanna thank Yazid for accompanyin me while waitin for bus 161. we had the last moment b4 we'll meet again. gave the big brother a hug and set off home i went. Flash and Superman will always be remain as bestfriends. brothers. something came into ma mind. do i sound im gay? hahaha. hope not. im NOT anw. rite.

another thing b4 i go. i miz ARFAH too!!!!!!!!!!!! haiz. we'll be seein each other TMW!!! weee~! like, at last? haha. miz her so much. icantwaiticantwaiticantwait. haiz. been thinkin bout her the whole day sia... haiya...

so, above all this, i juz miz everybody la...
haiz. think im outty.
tc ppl. Happy New Year...
to Impian, happy 17th birthday...
to the ppl make it to sec 5, all the best...
adios...

3:40 PM
0 heroic comments